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Ask Dr. Carolle |
Any suggestions about improving my sex life?
My husband and I have been married for over 25 years. Now that all
the children are gone, I was assuming that being all alone we would have more time for
each other and that our sex life will be better, but this does not appear to be happening.
I love my husband and I am committed to stay married.
Should I see a therapist?
: Learning
techniques that involve pleasurable touching, as well as enhancing your communication
skills so you and your partner feel comfortable telling each other what feels good, can be
more effective than psychotherapy.
Some ways to increase interest in sex include:
- fantasy
- role playing
- candles
- music
- sexy movies
- books
- communication of your desires
- prioritizing time for sexual intimacy
Plan a vacation or a weekend together alone. Make it fun
again!
A healthy lifestyle, stress control, and regular exercise
can improve a depressed mood.
Make time for yourself and make time for sex! One way to
make sex work for years is to "treat each other as lovers."
A book that I'd like to recommend is by D. O'Connor,
"How to Make Love to the Same Person for the Rest of Your Life-and Still Love
It."
If you still have problems with your sex life after trying
these suggestions, or if there are other types of marital conflicts, you and your husband
would benefit from seeing a marital counselor.
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